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By Slim Randles


Life in a small town means everybody knows what’s going on, good or bad. Just take what happened to Dud the other day. 

   It was trash day, and the trash barrels were on the street waiting to be emptied into the weekly truck. Dudley Campbell was no different from his neighbors, having his cans at the curbside ready for a trip to the dump. His wife, Anita, had driven to the city to do some shopping, so Dud was home alone.

  And probably that’s why he felt secure in going through his own garbage. First, he spread a tarp out on the ground next to the cans and then dove in. He resembled a badger trying to dig up a squirrel as he went lower and lower in the garbage can and the pile on the tarp grew larger.

   Mrs. Miller lived just across the street from Dud, and was watching the whole operation. She made a horrified phone call across town to Mamie Dilworth, who then passed it along to Windy Wilson. Windy, she knew, was a man of action.

  He’d know what to do.

  And he did. The bags of groceries were put on Dud’s porch when he wasn’t looking. The used-but-clean clothing for both Dud and Anita were laid on the porch swing.

   Anita discovered them when she got home and was the one who informed her husband of the porch treasure. 

  At supper that evening, Anita asked Dud if he’d done anything to warrant this largesse. I mean, Anita had been clothes shopping all day, so she knew it wasn’t her.

  And Dud said, “Hon, the only thing I did differently today was to find that little bronze horse statue I use for a paperweight. I had accidentally tossed it in the trash.”


Brought to you by the bronze horse statues on Ebay, if you like really fancy stuff. Expensive, but they don’t eat much.